Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy -By Mukadam Hawau Oluwakemi

Comparison is the thief of joy according to Theodore Roosevelt which tends to mean when we compare ourselves to what others have or simply how they are, we are essentially making ourselves low self-esteem to match.  From the library of Madeleine Shaw, she said comparison is unnecessary because it inflicts feelings of self-hate wastes time, and deprives one’s joy.

Bully is what I know to be something common in our society or can I say in this Era of ours? Bully in terms of body size, height, shape, stretch mark, saggy breast, and delights. So, what should we call parents forcing their child on getting married just because most of their mates are already married? One thing I notice in this scenario is that those forcing their child into marriage appeared to be single mothers and some who had a broken marriage/ home. Even if it’s a lineage curse why can’t parents stop it for history not to keep repeating itself?

Most ladies nowadays see marriage as a competition and fun but I’m seeing beyond two aforementioned,  marriage is a white gown full of commitment perseverance, tolerance, and good money, and so on I can’t continue to mention. The reason I said marriage is about good money is that love without money is lust sometimes such love won’t last long. Despite most of our mother’s full commitment and tolerance for their husband some still later landed in the land of a broken marriage and become a single mother, now compare to we ladies of nowadays,  that have already traded our respect, culture, and moral for civilization. Yet, I’m seeing some mothers maltreating their children to get married just because their mates are already getting married.  Let’s set aside Qadar ( fate) and face the reality of the race I run or running is different from the one you’re running look into twin that a mother gives birth to on the same day but nevertheless had same mannerism or favored the same color. Not talk of those even by Glucose they never related and it’s said comparison is the thief of joy, Dear Mothers stop comparing your children to their mates.

Let me use myself as an example, I’m the type of person who can’t do two things at once it’s either I leave one for the other. So, with this, some set of people are born of choosing career first for anything with forcing or maltreating of getting into marriage can hinder such person’s passion.  In the book; rewiring your brain,” it’s said the brain can be hardwired for it to work in a predetermined way and later also said the statement is falsified that brain is not hardwired it’s soft-wired by experience or challenges. So, the pressure some parents give especially in this piece can hinder children’s potential for vulnerability.

Luring a child into marriage is not the best step especially if there is no spiritual stuff involved.  As a parent, if at all marriage is what is important or the next thing you feel for your child don’t raise to pressurize your child because marriage is a lifetime university, and completion of Deen is not to be forced into.

Self-comparison deflated and thief one’s joy we all have a unique potential and born of different mission and vision, so every individual should believe that everything about you is beautifully made.  Replacing those negative thoughts with positive ones; thoughts that make us embrace self-worth, self-care, and self-love in lieu of what society might say, is normal to love oneself because it prompts Infectious positivity.

It’s something common to appreciate what others have without any form of inferiority to put a dampener on your own life most especially on another planet created by a man named social media. Social media has grown and the way is still improving it shows more and more people are going to grasp its impact, it has brought a lot of advantages for society in promoting nations to underdeveloped countries, every nation is utilizing the power of social media to enhance life mostly in education;

It is very easy to educate others who are experts and professionals via social media. You can follow anyone to learn from and enhance your knowledge about any field. Regardless of your location and educational background, you can educate yourself, without paying for it, and as well BUSINESS;  can also improve business sales and reputation. Positive comments and sharing about a company can help them with sales and goodwill. Since people are free to share whatever they want on social media, it can impact positively when goodwill is shared.

Whether you have an offline business or online, you can promote your business to the largest audience. The whole world is open for you and can promote to them. This makes the businesses profitable and less expensive because most of the expenses made over a business are for advertising and promotion. This can be decreased by constantly and regularly involved in social media to connect with the right audience. Social media diversity of impact order than it’s falsify

people falling into unnecessary depression due to material things they are seeing online,  committing suicide just because they get low comments and likes online ( Twitter and Facebook) is something that saddens my heart when we have many things we can make use of social media positively and impactful. The only person you should compare yourself to is yourself this may sound absurd but if we compare ourselves to ourselves then we are not only benefitting our lives and anytime one being Carried away with the illusion online put down your phone and take a walk, the fresh air, and beautiful nature will kick any negative feelings from where they came from.

Comparison is the thief of joy and leads only to insecurity. Accept that everyone is different and remember where your strength lies you might not be great at basketball you make delicious banana bread and something that to be celebrated.

Mukadam Hawau Oluwakemi
Student of the Federal University of Technology Minna, Niger State.
Estate Management and Valuation

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