It is bad, even worse, but it could have been worst -By Swandy Banta

This week I got talking with people who are struggling with one difficulty or the other. I got off each conversation wondering how more complex life can get.

Trust me I always felt my issues were worse. These days I say “just wait till you hear another person’s story”

I don’t know who’s reading my essay now while passing through one of the toughest moments of life. Whatever your situation is I need you to know for certain that there are worse cases than yours.

Few days ago, I read about the popular singer Celine Dion. She began her musical career at the age of 12. Fantastic singer, I must say. Infact I envied her flawless singing and strained my vocal cords struggling to sing along when her beautiful songs played back in the days.

I was however somewhat shocked to read that in between those beautiful songs Celine Dion suffered series of difficulties in her life and even up until this moment
Celine has had to deal with being married to a man her mother hated. I don’t blame her mom, Rene was way older than she was. His first son is even older than Celine herself.

As if that was not enough, she suffered infertility. Took several failed attempts before she had her first child and then twins. Just when it seemed life was going to be so good, Rene suddenly comes down with cancer, which eventually claims his life.

Painful situations are usually accompanied by a crippling effect. If you’ve been there you can relate. Getting out of bed in the morning is usually a tough call.

Your mental, physical, psychological and spiritual capabilities are thoroughly weakened. Even if you wanted to reach out and do the needful, most times the strength is just not within reach.

So I wonder how Celine Dion managed to produce and sing those beautiful songs that spiced up our lives. She was crushing yet emitting a fragrance we were thoroughly enjoying.

So in the words of Azumi Zaima…She says, Nobody knows…

Nobody knows it’s empty,
The smile that I wear.
The real one is left behind in the past
Because I left you there…

Nobody knows I am crying.
They won’t even see my tears.
When they think I am laughing,
I wish you were here…

Nobody knows it’s painful.
They think that I am strong.
They say it won’t kill me,
But I wonder if they are wrong…

Nobody knows I miss you.
They think I am all set free,
But I feel like I am bound with chains,
Trapped in the mystery…

Nobody knows I need you.
They think I can do it on my own,
But they don’t know I am crying
When I am all alone…

Most times we are so crushed that we succumb to the numbness of pain. We get so weak that we just stop doing and being what we were so good at doing before the crises began.

We become roses who forget how to emit the fragrance we were once known for.

I have realized that the fact that you are passing through a difficult time doesn’t mean you can’t be a source of blessing to others. The truth is that most times we produce the very best of ourselves and capabilities when we are at the most pressuring, tough back against the wall situations.

Sadly most of us get consumed in life’s crises that we waste our pain. Painful situations must never be wasted. I didn’t waste pain when my Dad died. It was a crushing period. I had so much on my mind. My Dad was an amazing person that couldn’t just go away like that. I wanted the world to know that I had the most amazing father in the whole world who had just died.

So one day I just picked up my pen and paper. I began to write. A year later my book “when it happens’ was born. That book helped me heal after the death of daddy.

Trust me, I’m so glad I didn’t waste my pain. My life has taken a new turn.

I’m still crushing but emitting a fragrance that’s a source of healing. So for you my friend who’s passing through a very tough time now, I need you to get determined to live out your destiny and impact lives even in this difficult time. A crises period is a fertile ground for working exploits you never dreamed you had capabilities to do.

Swandy Banta is blue blooded, ask her what that means and she gladly tells you, she’s been through the tunnel of pain and she found illuminating light. She writes and coaches on the difficult subject of pain. Whether it’s national pain, community pain or the pain of loss and the hurts of life that makes us all ask why—she brings new perspectives. Swandy can be reached on swandy.banta@gmail.com