Why Are So Many Good Ladies Single? -By Eberechi Ohaji-Akwani

Simply because they aren’t bad. Yes! Because they are good. Don’t get me wrong. It’s good to be good but it’s better to be ‘bad’.

See a ‘bad’ girl isn’t a bad girl. Don’t be confused. It’s only the foolish ones that are bad. More confusing? Wait let me explain.

A ‘bad’ girl is one who knows what being bad entails. She knows how to handle her business. She is crafty yet subtle. She isn’t in your face with lewd behaviour or that easily available stuff. Yet she is approachable and friendly. She knows when to be coy and when to be aggressive or assertive. She knows to know what’s in vogue and what’s out of vogue. She is friendly without being loose. She has a smile that lights up her eyes. She may be scheming to get stuff out of you but you will swear she doesn’t want your money or anything. She is genuinely interested in you and is so much fun to be with.

That bad girl will leave you with a hunger in your heart and a thirst on your tongue. She’s intriguing without seeming cloistered. She’s genuinely interested in you and is not easily traumatized as she’s schooled in handling and deflecting unwanted falling bananas without making a song and dance about it.

She knows her hunting ground. She will hunt just as adeptly in church as in the club. There is a cloak of mystery around her. She’s a temptress in church and a virgin in the club. She will confuse you and all you do is yearn to unravel the mystery. She will discuss the new world order with as much aplomb as she will discuss the Davido and Wizkid beef. Damn! She will dissect politics and human hair with as much dexterity. The bad girl is a good girl. She is a chameleon with a good heart. She will adapt to suit the requirements.

You see, since the society has kept shifting the goal posts, the bad girl has learnt to dribble like JayJay and score like Papillo.

You know why good girls are single? Because they are good and that’s all. They are like healthy food, good for you but terribly bland and uninteresting. Why do you think people cheat on diets? Of course diets are restrictive and usually bland. But a good meal is full of dangerous stuff but so so tasty.

I agree that all these will not guarantee marriage but still it will increase your chances. Goody 2 shoes wallpaper kinda girls will be passed over for the exciting rowdy girl who tickles your mind, heart and your loins.

And this is the gospel of the bard.

© Eberechi Ohaji-Akwani