Men: Victims Of Domestic Violence -By Rabiu Adeyika Mohammed

It is a common knowledge that when one heard of domestic violence, women naturally comes to mind as the ones at the receiving ends. Females are always projected as the victims of domestic violence, hence, violence against men is  underreported.

United Nations describes Domestic abuse, also called “domestic violence” or “intimate partner violence” IPV,  “as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Abuse is physical, sexual, emotional, economic or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person. This includes any behaviours that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone”.

As maintained by the United Nations that domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender, it is still considered absurd when the report is coming from man and some have the sentiments  that becoming an abusive woman is as a reaction to husband violent actions as a self defense. This is the opinion of the society and it is expected of  men to be silent and not raise alarm when needed so as not be considered weak.

Men who speak up about domestic violence experience social stigma regarding their perceived lack of machismo and other denigrations of their masculinity. Moreover, intimate partner violence (IPV) against men is generally given less attention by society than IPV against women, which further stands as block to men reporting their situation.

According to Uzoamaka Chukwuma of the Department of Sociology, University of Ibadan (UI), in a doctoral thesis defended in Lagos said that in spite of being abused, men won’t report their ordeal, because they fear stigmatisation from friends and family. “They usually do not want any third-party interference and because they are still financially dependent on their wives.

According to her “More married men are becoming victims of spousal abuse, but suffer in silence, because the society does not believe men can be victims of spousal abuse, hence, the non-disclosure of such experience for fear of stigmatisation”.

As much as the media focus on violation against women there are considerable numbers of domestic violence against men too. For example in England and Wales, the  “Home Office Research Study 191” surveyed 10,844 people (5,886 women and 4,958 men) between the ages of 16 and 59, finding that for the twelve-month period preceding the survey, 4.2% of men had experienced IPV. Over a lifetime, this figure increased to 14.9% of men. Of the 6.6 million incidents of IPV, 3.25 million involved male victims, with 1 million incidents resulting in injury. And their statistics keeps going higher by the day.

In Africa, Nigeria especially, reports of IPV against men are not well reported but it is happening. One out of many cases of IPV against men is the report from DailyNigerian the story of Olanrewaju Adeniran who wants his marriage with the wife, Fatimah desolved by Grade A

Customary Court in Mapo in Ibadan, because of the abuses he received from his wife.

According to Adeniran, a retired civil servant said that his wife was rude and was becoming a threat to his life. “After our wedding in May 1995, Fatima started misbehaving. She is rude to my mother and relatives. She beats me and grabs my private parts. Fatima calls me bastard, lazy man and so many other unprintable names,” he explained.

In a research work conducted by Paul O. Dienye, and Precious K. Gbeneol on Domestic Violence Against Men in Primary Care in Nigeria, it shows that the age distribution  of the men who  suffered domestic violence  ranged from 35 to 55  years, which constitutes the productive age  group.

Paul and Precious find a story of a 36-year-old  mechanical engineer  working  on an oil drilling  platform presented with  2-day history of wound  on the right leg. The  injury was said to have  been sustained during a  fight with his wife who in annoyance poured hot  water from a kettle on  his leg. There had been  previous episodes of  disagreements with her  in which she had  physically abused him.  He reported this present  episode to the police  and was asked to obtain a medical report from a  physician. Physical  examination revealed  scratches on the neck,  bruises on the head, and superficial burns on the  right calf which was  painted with gentian  violet.

Similarly, a 43-year-old  commercial bank  manager presented in the  company of a policeman with a 1-day history of wounds on the head, neck, and right arm. He had a scuffle with his wife who had been suspecting him of  infidelity because he  was always returning  home late from work. He  came for the purpose of  obtaining medical report  from a physician for the  police. Physical examination revealed  bruises on the head and  right arm, scratches on  the neck, and welts on  the left upper arm.

Also from the findings is the case of This  51-year-old trader with secondary education reported to  the hospital with  scratch  marks on the face and  bruises on the hand. These injuries were sustained during a fight with the wife. He  claimed that his wife  was making excessive  financial demands which  he could not satisfy  hence the frequent  disagreements,  culminating in fights. He  reported to the police  and was referred to the  hospital to obtain  medical report. A  diagnosis of domestic  violence against  husband was made.

These are very few cases of IPV faced by men out of many happening out there. Be it any gender, age, or race domestic violence should be discouraged. This article is not to disregard females ordeal about domestic violence but to bring to attention of society the situation of men and be given fair hearing. And stigmatisation should be eliminated

It is high time that the society should start listening to men side of the story. Stigamatisation has been the major reason men refuse to speak up. The fear of what the society will take them for; a coward or disable man. To save the men, their feelings and emotions must be put into consideration. With this the society will be balance and fair towards all.

Rabiu Adeyika Mohammed. Bayero University Kano.